As a storm rages outside the walls of Dragonstone, a spider swears allegiance to a dragon inside the walls.
I was a little nervous for Varys at first, but fortunately he survived Dany’s interrogation and did not lose his head or get devoured. He swore his loyalty to Dany and she was kind enough to swear an oath to him as well. Betray her and he’ll be burned alive. Sounds reasonable. Also terrifying. The apple may not fall too far from the mad king pyromaniac tree after all. Well, as long as she isn’t influenced right afterwards by someone who has experience at burning people alive…oh come on!
Melisandre shows up to visit the Mother of Dragons with a message. Go north because the real war is up there and the white walkers are doing something and they have an army of undead and how many times do we have to hear this? It looks like it’s going to get Jon and Dany in the same place at least.
“Incompetence should not be rewarded with blind loyalty. As long as I have my eyes, I’ll use them.” — Varys
Cersei holds court and threatens death on those houses that will not follow her. Business as usual. Randyll Tarly doesn’t seem convinced and needs a little more persuading from Jaime. He’s a Tarly after all. That means something. Duty, honor, loyalty, and what’s that? Warden of the South? Well I should at least hear ser Jaime out… I can’t stand this guy.
Oh, and he named one of his sons Dickon.
Later on underneath the Red Keep where they keep the dragon skulls we get to hear Maester Qyburn’s grand scheme to take out Dany’s dragons. This is the guy who made FrankenMountain and orchestrated the wildfire explosion so you know we’re in for something really innovative! Or it could just be a giant crossbow? Yep. It’s a giant crossbow. Made of some flammable wood no less. Good call.
“If they can be wounded, they can be killed.” — Qyburn
Jorah has seen better days. He’s given six months to live with the option to take his own life before he is sent off to be with the Stone Men. Sam takes matters into his own hands and attempts to save Jorah behind Archmaester Marwyn’s back. The process is painful. (Both to Jorah and to watch.) I hope this dragonglass theory of Sam’s works. I’m sure it won’t be as black and white as that however. Probably a grey area. (I hate myself.)
“You’re not dying today, Ser Jorah.” — Sam
Things heat up in the war room. Tyrion and Dany come up with a plan that sounds really good, but doesn’t make much sense to me. Let’s split up our All-Star team of armies and sail half of our fleet to Dorne first before we sail back up the sea to King’s Landing. Did Dragonstone run out of ravens? I really hate this plan. Naturally, everyone in the war room goes along with it.
The best advice Dany received came from our Queen of Thorns…
“You’re a dragon. Be a dragon.” — Lady Olenna
The North and Winterfell
Hot Pie! Arya’s old friend always makes me laugh. After exchanging recipes (a bit more Frey in Arya’s pies) Hot Pie informs Arya that the Starks once again hold Winterfell. She puts her list on hold for the time being and heads north. Hot Pie may have saved her life with that information. As long as there are no rabid wolves in the forest that is…
Back in Winterfell, Jon makes his decision to go to Dragonstone to the dismay of Sansa and the rest of the northern lords. He then leaves her in charge of the North while he is gone to the delight of Sansa and none of the northern lords. I wasn’t worried about Jon for making this move. It was his next move that has me worried. Don’t get me wrong, we’d all like to choke Littlefinger. This probably wasn’t the best time for that however. Brienne better stay close by.
Hey, look at that. Rabid wolves in the forest! Arya seems like she’s in trouble, but… Nymeria is back! A short reunion and a reminder of who Arya is and has been all along. They’re just two lone wolves passing in the woods. Her words, “That’s not you,” are a nice callback to the conversation with her father back in season one.
The moment in the show when I wet myself.
Battle of the Greyjoys
Euron smash! Well, that escalated quickly. Two Sand Snakes go down and Ellaria and her one remaining daughter get taken captive. Half of Dany’s fleet is decimated in this battle scene. Yara is also taken prisoner. Theon…well… Theon is recreating the last scene from “Titanic.” That water looks cold. Somebody better get him a whistle.
Thoughts and Theories
- Dany is not going to like hearing about the destruction Euron caused. Burn them all. Queen of the Ashes.
- Seriously? A giant crossbow? Come on Qyburn!
- Jorah’s favorite tea? Earl Greyscale! (Now that’s just terrible. Last one I promise.)
- Finally get to see Casterly Rock next week. Let’s hope part two of Tyrion’s plan works a little better.
- A good old fashioned Littlefinger double-cross is on it’s way soon.
- Did anyone else want to see Arya ditch her horse and hop on Nymeria? Oh well.
- Yara might survive, but how does Cersei not instantly kill Ellaria and the Sand Snake on sight? Assuming they all make it back to King’s Landing.
- You think Theon will swim into Gendry? He’s still rowing out there.
That’ll do it for this week. A lot of pieces moved around and it was capped off with a cool battle at sea. No complaints here. Thanks for reading and leave anything I missed or you would like to talk more about in the comments!
“That’s what I do. I drink and I know things.”